Holding Pattern

We're at the end of the line with the school district, for the moment anyway. And yet, the news is, I think, cautiously positive. Mr. Spy and I each spoke this morning with the district Director of Curriculum, who is, among other things, in charge of admission policy for the gifted program. I'm finding that talking to everyone, from the teachers on up, tends to result in their talking very fast over you, as if to anticipate problems before they happen. They all use the, "I understand -- I'm just like you" kinds of lines. These are mostly defensive, but still well-meaning. For the most part, anyway. And I don't think it's necessarily a conscious manipulation. I do think, however, that as a parent-advocate, you need to know how to push through it. Otherwise, when you get out of the conversation, you are left scratching your head and saying, "What just happened?"

Good point number one -- every single person we've dealt with, from the classroom teacher to the district administrators -- has done when that said they would when they said they would do it. This is huge. It means good communication in the district. It means they're taking us seriously.

Good point number two -- the Curriculum Director is talkative, but she is also friendly and smart and we were largely in agreement on matters of educational philosophy. However, she still couldn't tell us what we wanted to hear. But she didn't say no either.

We heard more about the district's reevaluation of the criteria for gifted program admission that our school principal had mentioned last week. It is not just an idea, it's actually happening and it's supposed to be in place this fall. The new policy will add two more criteria and take the weight off the one test. They're still trying to figure out what criteria will be included and in what weighting. They will likely include test scores, portfolio, teacher recommendations and parent recommendations. The goal is to get more kids what they need. It also sounds like the district may be reevaluating the pull-out program. The C.D. is on the fence about it. She has been looking at districts that use a gifted label, but not a gifted program and focus on training and supporting classroom teachers. I think this is a great direction, if it works. What we want is not a label, but the extra challenge AJ needs. But when there is a label, when there is a pull-out program, we need that too. Because if we don't, he is unlikely to get what he needs. When there is a pull-out program, teachers rely on it.

The C.D. seemed to think that it was likely that AJ would be included by the new criteria, especially since he's only 1 point away by the old criteria. But she can't promise -- there are others who, like us, are advocating for their kids. She promised to get him what he needs in the classroom and to call her any time if I needed help. But she couldn't guarantee the pull-out. All she could do is say it looked likely. If we want guarantees, the only thing left is testing -- assuming the test scores are high enough. And so we will be spending the $500 to have him tested later this month and hope it helps.

One thing that worries me slightly, though, is that we're getting mixed messages about how much the test scores will help. The gifted teacher had told us that they will substitute the private testing for the OLSAT score. But that's not what the C.D. said. She said it would be included in the things they look at, although she also said that it was the only thing that really has made a difference in the past. This does not sound like a guarantee to me either, but at least it sounds promising.

While we didn't get what we'd hoped to get, we did get what we expected to hear, more or less. And now we know to focus our energies on learning about the IQ testing on May 19.

I hope all these stories about the process are not too tedious to read. My hope is that others can learn from our experience, that it will help others learn how to advocate for their kids. Since we have a lull in the process, I'm working on a more general post on advocacy and another one on how to approach IQ tests with your kids. I would love to hear some more voices on this subject. If you're interested in posting here on these or other subjects of giftedness, please email me at harri3tspyATgmailDOTcom.

Waiting some more

First of all, I would like to apologize for the ads that are appearing on this site. I'm not sure how they got there or how to move or eliminate them. Until I have time to figure it out, you'll have to put up with them. On the plus side, they earned 6 whole cents last night. Just doing my part for the economy.

A couple of more things have happened on the testing front. We have an appointment with the school principal, but not until Friday. I don't want to talk to anyone at the district level before I talk to him, so having to wait a few days will slow us down, but hopefully not too much. I think maintaining the goodwill of the school is too important to mess around with, so we're back in waiting mode. I've also contacted a psychologist about testing. Depending on the cost of the tests, we may just go ahead and do it. Or we may wait and see what we can accomplish with the school. Either way, though, I'm going to talk to the district about waiving the minimum scores. I feel that the weighting of the test as compared to other methods of evaluation is problematic and it doesn't do what the state statutes aim to set up, which is to give students with test-taking disadvantages (the state is particularly concerned with disadvantages caused by language barriers and socio-economic class, which often fall along racial lines) an alternate route in. It would appear that the weighting will probably maintain the status quo -- a gifted program full of wealthy white kids (While we're not wealthy, we're not impoverished either. Despite my own opinions about my personal finances, I count us in that category. We have the know-how and means to find private testing. Not everyone does).

We did talk to AJ about the situation last night. He brought it up. He knew we'd met with the gifted teacher. He also knew something we didn't -- his friend got an envelope from the gifted teacher in class yesterday and he didn't. AJ, probably rightly, assumed that it was about getting into the gifted program and he wanted to know why he didn't get one. So we told him the whole story. We emphasized that the test was not a good test for him, that it wasn't a problem with the way he took it, but with the test itself and the way the school made decisions about it and we assured him that we and his teachers were doing our best to make sure he got into the program. But he still felt bad, like he did something wrong. "Why was it so easy for him?" he asked about his friend at bedtime last night. "Why did he get in just like that and it's so hard for me?" It was a sensible question. AJ often works with his friend, but AJ is working at a level above him in both math and reading. We talked about how people's brains work differently. How comparing yourself to others doesn't really work that well. AJ's friend is quiet, a good listener, and a follower of instructions. AJ is loud, easily distracted, and a questioner of everything. They both belong in the program, but they are not going to get there by the same road.

But I am worried about the toll this may be taking on AJ. He has always been called "the smart kid." And no matter what we say, he's not feeling like the smart kid right now. He is a kid who needs a lot of outside validation. He is suspicious of reassurance. He thinks it means we're hiding something. Before we keep going, I want to make sure he's up for it. He says he is, but I'm not sure if he's thought about his options. And I need to figure out how to help him trust himself to give himself his own feedback. He's been going through a very difficult time lately -- getting argumentative at home and disobedient at school. I want him to be confident and challenged, to know his abilities even if others deny them. If I had the formula for that, I'd be a wealthy woman.

Just about to leap

I spent a long time on the phone with my friend J (sometimes known as Mrs. Unfocused. Eventually she will pick her own pseudonym and join us here) talking about our gifted kids and schools and a few other things. It helped a lot to talk to someone else who both knows AJ and understands the situation from her own personal experience. I'll let her tell you about her challenges with finding the right classroom for her daughter, because I know she wants to. But thanks for letting me bend your ear, J!

After reading all of your thoughtful comments and talking to J, I was feeling a little more clearheaded about what I need to do and the order in which I need to do it.

1. Email AJ's teacher to ask for her thoughts on approaching the school. I hope to do this this afternoon, or possibly tomorrow. But I was volunteering in the classroom today, so today would be a good day.

2. Have AJ tested. This is taking place a week from Saturday. We will receive a verbal assessment immediately following AJ's evaluation. This is not a full IQ test, but the results should still be something that can support our case. AJ's kind of excited about this, which is great.

3. Meet with the school principal. I plan to approach this as an informational/brainstorming meeting about AJ's Specific Needs request for next year and how it will be implemented and what I can do to help. I will also ask about class size and the teacher search. I would be interested in having the gifted teacher in on this meeting as well, but I think the principal is the one who needs to make that suggestion. If he doesn't, I'll meet with her separately. But one of the things I will ask for in the case of giant classrooms is one-on-one meetings with the gifted teacher. This is something that school policy currently doesn't permit for second graders, but it should be a low-cost way to help us in the event that the district doesn't come through with the extra teacher, which currently seems likely.

4. Meet with the gifted teacher to talk about continuity in AJ's curriculum. I think she's been providing great materials for AJ this year, but the things he does don't really constitute a curriculum -- they're not organized toward overall learning goals. But for AJ, they are largely standing in for a curriculum that is completely unsuitable for him. So I'd like to set some goals for him to accomplish and see if the gifted teacher can help us figure out how to make them work. I'm hoping she'll be able to be an advocate for him with his teacher next year, whoever that may be.

I hope to accomplish all of these things within the next 2-3 weeks. At the same time, I will be looking into state regulations and options and district history and I'm going to try to figure out how lobbying gets done. I'm not entirely sure who is in charge of what -- how is decision-making divided between the school board, district administration, and the individual school? I know the superintendent of the school district -- he was AJ's principal last year. Should I be trying to get in touch with him? And also, I'm going to be talking to people I know who teach at other schools in the district to see if I can find out what other people in the are doing.

I feel better having some plans in place. And I feel better after talking with J about keeping AJ in his current school despite all that's going on. Because the fact is, socially he is happy there. And for many if not most gifted kids, the social aspect of school is a crucial part of the picture, even if some of the other stuff isn't going right. I've also been impressed lately at how AJ gets himself through the mundane tasks and finds way to make them more interesting. For example, earlier this week he brought home a worksheet with a partially filled grid of numbers from 100-200. He was supposed to fill them in. Rather than writing them in order (101...102...103...snore), he filled in numbers randomly, picking a box and writing the number in. After he tired of that, he asked me to time him to see how fast he could finish the worksheet. This latter idea was probably not great for his handwriting, but it kept him engaged and that's really all I can ask.

Specific Needs Request

As some backstory to the discussion underway in the previous entry, I thought I'd post our formal request to AJ's school for individual support. At the suggestion of AJ's current teacher, we filed a "Sp3cific N33ds F0rm" (SNF) with the school. This is our first official request for gifted education support. We had alerted the school to the probable need for services when we registered AJ for kindergarten. This year, we just talked to his teacher as soon as possible, giving her a brief overview of what to expect on the meet your teacher event the day before school started and setting up a one-on-one appointment for a few days later.

The SNF is a very general sort of form and asks parents to request what their child needs and not a specific teacher. This was fine with us, because the only 2nd grade teacher we know is retiring at the end of this year. The form is primarily intended for students with learning disabilities of various sorts. This can mean anything from dyslexia to Down's syndrome to severe behavioral problems. It hadn't occurred to us that we could file a form like this for AJ, so we were very glad that his teacher came up with it. Here is what we wrote, with the help of AJ's teacher, who provided us with some of the language we needed to get our point across to educators (I'm still not sure what the difference between modification and differentiation is):

AJ is a very bright and intellectually curious child, and in first grade has been working well above grade level in both reading and math. He needs a teacher who is willing to work with [the school's gifted teacher] to modify or differentiate the curriculum to keep him challenged, and to hold him accountable for doing advanced work. We’re looking for a teacher who is willing to give him assignments that will keep him challenged and motivated, but who will also include him in class activities so that he will not feel like an isolated “special case.” [AJ's 1st grade teacher] and his parents are happy to talk further about what has been done for him this year and what he might need in the future.

Part of the reason why all this stuff about class size is alarming is that we don't know any of the teachers and, in fact, only one of the second grade teachers is returning next year. This means that two (or three if we're lucky and they give us four classrooms) will be brand new to the school. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it is just one more piece of uncertainty in the puzzle.